I was shaking after 4 hours without an answer to my text
A personal exploration of insecure attachment reactions when a partner doesn’t respond, and an invitation to Radical Honesty practice.
2025-08-07The myth of Echo shows how mirroring others and losing your own voice can leave you faded - and how codependency can turn you into an echo in your own life.
I was Echo.
Always reflecting.
Never having a voice of my own.
I could read the room. Adapt.
Say the right thing. Keep the
peace.
And I did.
Not because I was weak.
But because it felt safer than being
misunderstood.
Safer than being too much.
And I’m not the only one...
There was once a nymph named Echo.
She had a voice. A beautiful one.
She used it freely. She played with words. She spoke her mind.
But one day, she was punished. Not for lying. Not for harming anyone.
Just for speaking too much.
The gods took her voice away. Not entirely. Just enough.
Enough that she could no longer speak her own thoughts. She could only repeat what others said.
And so, Echo became an expert at listening. At adapting. At mirroring what people wanted to hear.
She followed Narcissus into the woods. She longed for connection.
He called out, "Who's there?" She replied, "There."
He
said, "Let us meet." She echoed, "Meet."
But when she stepped out to embrace him, he rejected her.
He
didn’t recognize her love. Because he never really heard her.
And so, she faded. Not from heartbreak. But from having no voice of her own.
And that’s the part no one tells you.
That fading doesn’t always look like collapse.
Sometimes it looks like being the good friend.
The
thoughtful partner.
The perfect coworker.
The person who always gets it, always helps, always listens.
Sometimes it looks like being liked by everyone…
Except
yourself.
Because after a while, you forget what your own voice sounds like.
You open your mouth, and other people’s words come out.
You
speak, but only after you’ve rehearsed it in your head a dozen
times.
You express, but only if it won’t disturb anything.
You don’t even lie. You just… edit. You filter.
You say things like:
“I’m fine.”
“It’s okay.”
“No
worries.”
“I totally get it.”
“It’s not a big deal.”
Even
when it is.
And then one day you wake up
and realize you’ve become an echo in
your own life.
Becoming a nymph like Echo instead of a whole and real human happens
when we love other people more than ourselves
When we
become ADDICTED to other people.
When we put their well
being above our own.
We lose ourselves and we don’t really help them either.
By Jesper Jurcenoks
A personal exploration of insecure attachment reactions when a partner doesn’t respond, and an invitation to Radical Honesty practice.
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